


One should be able to have the man one loves.

by sarahcakes613



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: 5+1 Things, Introspection, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-27
Updated: 2020-05-27
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:08:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 738
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24409315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarahcakes613/pseuds/sarahcakes613
Summary: 5+1 Wedding Vows: Five things Rafael chose to say to Sonny in private and one he said in front of their friends and family.
Relationships: Rafael Barba/Dominick "Sonny" Carisi Jr.
Comments: 13
Kudos: 32
Collections: Marriage Barisi Bingo





	One should be able to have the man one loves.

**Author's Note:**

> Unlike most of my other wedding fic, this has zero basis for comparison to my own, bc we didn't write our own vows and wow am I glad bc writing someone else's was hard enough!

1\. You inhabit a place in every one of my five senses. When I put on my sweater and smell your cologne, and I know you’ve been wearing it when I was away. When I come home from work and you’re singing along to the radio, even though I leave it tuned to La X and you don’t understand half the songs. Every morning when I wake up and you are sleeping next to me, and I get to watch you wake up. The feel and the taste of your lips on mine. Every atom of my being is subsumed by yours. As long as you exist in my world, I am not alone and that’s how I always want it to be.

2\. Like with everything you do better than me, it took you no time at all to begin speaking my love language. From the first time you brought me coffee, you’ve always known what I needed and when I needed it, even when I couldn’t put it into words. We both know the learning curve has been a bit steeper as I have worked to speak your love language, but I hope by sharing these words with you today, I am showing you that I am getting better at speaking it. I will continue to try every day to tell you how much you mean to me, how much I value your insight, and how much I appreciate everything you do for me.

3\. You make me want to be a better person. When I watch you with your nieces, all I can think is what an incredible father you will be, and how much you deserve that opportunity. I could joke and say that it’s because you share their emotional maturity, but it’s because you understand them and talk to them as whole beings, and they trust you for it. I have been afraid for so long to even hope to think of fatherhood as an option for myself but you remind me that good men exist, and that maybe I have it in me to be a good man, because I have you to look to for guidance and you won’t steer me wrong.

4\. Your smile brings sunshine into my life, and I will never stop working to keep that smile from being dimmed. Your energy is electric, and watching you work at something you are passionate about is like staring directly into the sun. No one can control the outcome of every court case, and I know there will be days you can’t help but bring your work home, days where you won’t be able to see through the clouds. There will be days when you want to quit, when you want to give up everything you’ve worked for. You’ll be caught in the rain and unable to see your way to the clearing, but I promise to always provide a shelter from the storm.

5\. When I see how you talk to victims on the stand, you bring the most compassionate energy. You are patient, you are understanding, you are the quiet calm in their storm. You are an advocate for everything that is good in our justice system and you rally against all that is bad. You make me believe that change is possible, and I am so proud that I get to watch you be part of that change. You once told me you weren’t sure leaving SVU for the DA’s office was the right call, that you worried you weren’t helping as many people. It’s never about how many people you save. Every person you help is one more than nothing and that matters.

+1. I left the DA’s office in flames and I couldn’t find my way to water, and there you were. You could have forgotten I existed, but instead you showed up at my house with dinner and a boxset of Murder She Wrote and even after you went home, you didn’t really leave. You asked for nothing and I gave it to you in abundance and you took it without complaint. It took me longer than I care to admit, to see what was right in front of me, and that was you. There are so many reasons I love you and so many reasons I am grateful for you. This is only one, but it’s the most important. You saved me, Sonny.

**Author's Note:**

> Title is a quote from Larry Kramer's fictitious self, Ned Weeks. Kramer passed away today. His activism changed the face of gay life in America. May his memory be a blessing.


End file.
